WORRY

Another stressor you can control and that is related to last week's topic of negative thinking is worry. Worry is what I call negative mental imagery, which essentially is imagining all the things that you fear might happen or go wrong. You can't control the future or change the past so worry creates a lot of negative energy and stress for nothing. What you can control is the present moment, so you need to look at what you can do in this moment to replace worry.

One popular technique commonly used to counteract worry and that is sometimes effective is distraction. This can be in the form of some activity to take your mind off of the worrisome situation; do something that requires you to focus on that activity. Another form of distraction that can be used is mental imagery. One of the most common imagery is what is called "Peaceful Place" imagery. In this you imagine yourself in a safe and peaceful place, and then you mentally describe and feel what it is like there. Are you alone? If not, who else is there? What are you doing? What would you see, feel (temperature, breeze, etc), hear, or even smell (fragrance, aroma) in this place? The place can be a real or imaginary place. I will cover Peaceful Place Imagery in more detail in a future post.

Perhaps my favorite technique to deal with worry is that of replacing thoughts of what you want to have happen for worry thoughts of what you are afraid might happen. This allows you to think about the person or situation about which you are concerned. For example, if you have lost your job, imagine yourself finding the right job, going for an interview, and getting the job. This keeps the focus positive, which as we saw last week sets the body up for a positive response as opposed to the negative response of stress. Another example is to imagine a loved one serving in a war zone being strong and protected by fellow troops rather than worrying the loved one might get harmed. This technique is popularly used by athletes and performers who imagine themselves performing as they want instead of worrying about what might go wrong.

Finally, if you tend to be that worry addict and insist on worrying, my recommendation is that you limit your worry time to a set amount of time per day or week. In other words, schedule it in and when the time comes to worry spend that time actually worrying. If you find yourself worrying at other times, just tell yourself to stop and worry about it later at your scheduled time. When the time comes to worry, many people find they really don't have much to worry about and may even find themselves laughing.

If you have a specific situation you are worrying about and want some suggestions, please let me know, either through the comment section or through my email. For now, "Be Happy, Don't Worry".